It’s true what they say: “there’s an app for that.” And in this modern world, “that” is following the day-to-day thoughts of Kylie Jenner – a girl famous for having a famous sister.
On Sept. 14, each of the Kardashians launched a separate app. TMZ reporters said that by the end of the week, the apps had gathered almost one million downloads, most of which belonged to 18-year-old Kylie Jenner.
The apps are expected to earn the family $32 million dollars by next fall, 74 percent coming from Jenner’s subscribers.
The app is free to download, but the title screen will solicit $2.99 per month to “unlock [Jenner’s] world.”
The app offers a seven-day trial, but buyers beware; the app will charge you if you do not manually unsubscribe.
What does that subscription fee get you? A lot of bullshit, my friend. And let’s be clear: We’re dealing with a very specific kind of bullshit here. This bullshit reads as Jenner porn, painting her as a social goddess, fashion queen and sex icon.
It’s the kind of bullshit that breeds insecurity in women and glamorizes people for face-value contributions to society.
But here’s the real bullshit: The app is engineered to provide women a means of replicating Jenner, not following her.
Each post contains links to purchase different clothing, accessories or food that Jenner is flexing. This bullshit feels engineered to give women a way of wearing what she’s wearing, eating what she’s eating, listening to what she’s listening to and doing as she does.
You can even subscribe to notifications for this bullshit. Your phone will vibrate when new content is posted on the app. That’s right: Your phone goes off when Jenner posts a new outfit or her “favorite snack rn.”
The app is split into three sections: Radio, Looks and Lyfe.
The “Radio” section plays new tracks from rappers such as Drake, Travis Scott and Future. This part is honestly pretty good. Jenner has a pretty good taste for bad-bitch trap rap. If this kind of music is your flavor, a fresh soundtrack might validate the subscription fee on its own.
The “Looks” section features regular posts called “Cop My Style,” where Jenner’s outfits are broken down piece by piece. The posts also feature multiple images of Jenner looking ultra-fly in her threads.
To be fair, Jenner has mad-decent fashion sense. She looks like an American Apparel ad in the flesh.
“Lyfe” is a section about Jenner’s life. By that, I mean Instagram posts and video clips of her before photoshoots. This section is great for people who have ever wondered what it’s like to be so famous that all you do is get your picture taken and money given to you.
All three sections come together for a silky smooth user interface that feels like scrolling through a high-end fashion magazine. I was impressed I could navigate the app without taping the screen; everything flows.
If only the designers hadn’t filled it with complete bullshit.
This article originally appeared in the Sep. 23, 2015 print edition of The Echo.
image via www.huffingtonpost.com